The beginning  

Rosie had come to terms with depression and anxiety, providing a good home for her son, whilst working as a Nurse Practitioner at her local hospital.  Through work she met Ollie, a charismatic consultant, and they began a relationship. Rosie said ‘I was happy to meet Ollie, he was loving, caring and I felt I could share my life with him. Everything was great until one night after a work social event, Ollie changed. He began to make derogatory comments about how I looked and acted, and tried to control who I saw, what I wore, becoming abusive and sexually demanding when I did not do as he pleased.’

What came next

After months of abuse Rosie ended the relationship and with time moved on and met a new partner, Sean. Ollie heard through mutual work friends of Rosie’s new relationship and this is when the stalking started.

Ollie used their workplace to cause Rosie harm, making false allegations regarding her work to management and using colleagues to gain information about her personal life.  Rosie had shared details of her depression and anxiety with Ollie, however he used this to try and discredit Rosie amongst colleagues and her new partner Sean. Ollie proceeded to launch an attack on Sean, contacting his work and vandalising his car.

Reaching out for help

Rosie, feeling trapped and isolated, called Compass who connected her with Megan, an Independent Stalking Advocacy Caseworker from Changing Pathways. Megan listened to Rosie, giving space to express her concerns. Rosie’s mental health was deteriorating, and she was scared to visit her GP. Megan said, ‘I was fearful that I would be seen as a bad parent or unstable by social services, Ollie’s mum also works at my surgery.’ Megan supported Rosie to change GP surgeries and access private counselling.

Rosie wanted to report Ollie to the police but worried he would use her mental illness, his high standing in the community and charisma to convince the police that she was lying. In the past Rosie attempted suicide and was scared this would be used against her in court. Megan supported Rosie in meeting with the police to discuss her options and the court process which helped Rosie feel less anxious. This meeting was a step forward in building trust between Rosie and the police.

(The names in this story have been changed to protect identity)

Find out more about stalking and gain further support.

Stalking is a crime, if something doesn’t feel right, there is help available through Essex Compass, call

0330 333 7 444 or visit their website Essex Compass

If you are in immediate danger, always call 999.